Self Introduction Email
Subject: UCS1001
Self-introduction email
Dear Professor Brad,
I would like to take
this opportunity to introduce myself through this email. I am Benjamin Yap, a
year 1 Mechanical Design and Manufacturing Engineering student at Singapore
Institute of Technology. I graduated from Singapore Polytechnic with a diploma
in Mechatronics and Robotics Engineering. The most significant part of my
diploma would be my final year project, where I worked on designing a robot to
solve real-life issues. It taught me the importance of communication, teamwork,
empathy, and engineering knowledge. I have always enjoyed the process of
turning ideas into reality and it was through engineering that made it
possible. It led me to further my studies to gain more engineering knowledge,
in hopes of becoming a mechanical design engineer.
A communication strength
of mine is being open minded. Being open to suggestions and criticisms helps a
person to see things differently. There were several instances during my
work’s project where suggestions from users allows me to see things outside an
engineer’s view, which allows me to design a better solution than I intended
to.
A communication
weakness of mine is confidence. I fear public speaking and presentations as
they always make me nervous. There was once my mind went blank during a
presentation despite having ample preparation for it, which left me in silence
for a short while before I regained my composure.
I hope to be able to
gain confidence through this module as it would help me to be better composed
during presentations and conversations. I also hope to be able to improve my
ability to articulate my thoughts better, especially in the engineering field
where communication is important to convey ideas to various stakeholders.
I feel that helping
others without expecting anything in return makes me who I am, especially in a
society where people only help when they receive benefits in exchange. I will
continue to uphold it and possibly applying my engineering skills to help
improve the lives of others.
I look forward to learning and improving on myself through your classes.
Yours sincerely,
Yap Kian Hwee Benjamin
Edited: 31 March 2023
Hello Benjamin, your content is very well written and you got it straight to the point. Overall it is a great introduction about yourself. The flow of the email is very smooth and I don't see any problem with your grammar.
ReplyDeleteHi Jia Jun, I appreciate that you took time to read through my letter. Thank you for the input!
DeleteHi Benjamin, you have good content and flow of the letter. I have no issue understanding your letter. I don't see any problem with your grammar.
ReplyDeleteHi De Hooi, I appreciate that you took time to read through my letter. Thank you for the input!
DeleteDear Benjamin,
ReplyDeleteThank you for this informative letter. It's interesting for readers when you share your interest in robotics and background in terms of the FYP and how that had connections to comm skills like teamwork and empathy. It's also impressive that you see value in "the process of turning ideas into reality."
You also give an assessment of your own comm skills development, and it's good that you tie this to not just to what you want to improve in terms of presenting but also to interacting in the future with stakeholders.
In terms of English language, there are a couple areas in this letter you can improve:
1. sentence structure/use of pronouns
-- A communication strength of mine is being open minded, being open to suggestions and criticisms helps you to see things differently... > (comma splice)
A communication strength of mine is being open minded. Being open to suggestions and criticisms helps a person to see things differently....
-- A communication weakness of mine is confidence, I fear public speaking and presentations as they always make me nervous.... > (comma splice) ?
2. verb tense
-- ...where suggestions from the user helps me see.... > (consistent verb tense use?) ?
Don't let this feedback eclipse the fine job you did with this letter.
I look forward to hearing more from you this term.
Best wishes,
Brad
Dear Professor Brad,
DeleteThank you for spending time to read my letter and pointing out the things that I can improve on. I will definitely work on improving on my English language skills and apply what I've learnt to the other modules!
Dear Benjamin,
ReplyDeleteI've just read through your email and i felt, i could understood you better through your content. The flow of the content was smooth and grammar is correct.